A skill which is hyped but still underrated
Hear/read me carefully
This is going to be super cliche. So, I request you to stop reading and go and do your work/study or anything else.
Or, you can stay up with me as you can still go through this hyped thing.
Let’s go.
Listening is an art that requires attention over talent, spirit over ego, others over self.
—Dean Jackson
I think you understand why I requested you to stop reading. Still, if you are reading me, I won’t let you go now. You should read further, and I ensure you gain some value from here.
So, today's digest is all about listening well.
You know what? I am about to tell you something and make you listen well. Here it is:
I woke up at 8 AM today and felt so bad about myself. I slapped myself, saying that I am bad—very bad; I am not a man of my word. I just tell myself I will do this and that and end up sleeping late plus waking up late. I find myself binge-watching that movie or that fucking Hunny Bunny shows more important than waking up on time. I just tell myself—I will wake up at 6 AM daily, but I rarely wake myself up. And further, I don’t know if I am going to wake up or not.
I know you guys are ready with your effective, impactful, applied, and experimented solutions to share with me, but hold on to it. You know what? I don’t want any of them. I just wanted to share my rants with you about it. I know what to do to wake myself up early. I was throwing my frustrations at you to feel good about it. But it doesn’t happen every time because, as Stephen R. Covey has said in his book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People:
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”
—Stephen R. Covey
Damn! This is so true. We all listen to share our take on it; we want to reply instead of understanding. We do not always patiently listen to the person speaking to us. We just put a full stop to their incomplete words to start sharing our opinions or our story, which is too far relatable or not as related as theirs—who cares anyway? I just wanted to share something with you all, which is:
Listening well when you don’t feel like is an real art.To improve: Listen well when you don't feel like
Can you listen to my bullshit without interrupting me a single time? I know you can't, as you always have some opinions to share and try to help me out, but what if I just wanted someone who’ll listen to my bullshits without any labels and interruptions; no advice and no BS opinions? I know none of us want to listen to the rants and frustrations of others, but you should imagine what would happen if someone were there who’d listen to you. Just listen to you and listen to you to the very end. I know it feels like magic. And to see that magic happen with you, you need to be that magic to someone else.
I know you are there to help me out; many are there. I don’t want that help at all. I want to see and feel the magic while sharing my bullshit. I want to taste that magic and live with it. It feels so nice. I think it feels good to you too to see the magic happen. It’s hard to get companions who feel like there is something magical in them. You seek them here and there, where you should try to be that person and bloom magic here and there. It’s hard to be that person in someone else’s life because it’s hard to listen well when you don’t feel like listening. And so you seek that person here and there. But what if we can be that person in someone’s life? We can at least try to be—by asking big questions to ourselves.
How can you be that magical person?
Here’s the catch: You can’t be that magical person. Never! No matter how much I tell you, no matter how powerful the frameworks I will give, and no matter what. You will not be that magical person unless you want to be.
My open questions to you, and you should ask these questions to yourself:
Are you willing to listen and only listen to someone?
Are you willing to listen to one’s frustrations and rants?
Are you willing to listen when you don’t feel like listening to them?
Are you ready to be that magical person in someone’s life first?
Oh yes! Or, maybe yes. You say
Listen to me,
The word listen has the same letters as the word silent.
You should practice silence and empathy to become a magical person. (Yeah, listening well is magical.)
Let’s end this conversation with a few more words by Winston Churchill. Take a deep breath and hear me out:
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
—Winston Churchill
Listen well,
Happy Sunday :)